Monday, October 20, 2008

Chinese Cake Fights

It all started out innocent enough, but what transpired over dinner on Wednesday night was anything but typical...
Karl had one of his 9 days a month off last Wednesday and we decided to go out to dinner at The General, our favorite Chinese restaurant here in Bishkek. We've been several times but never had we experienced the utter chaos that ensued. After a 10 minute Soviet era electric trolley bus ride we walked up to the restaurant and found it packed. But, being preferred customers (Americans who tip more than the standard 10% they tack on bills here) a table was set up for us on the platforms along the wall. There were four huge tables in the main dining area where approximately 50 loud, raucous, drunk Chinese people were having dinner. They were shouting in some Chinese dialect, similar to Mandarin, and standing up to toast and drink every 2 minutes. Karl and I ordered our dinner and tried to figure out what they were speaking. After about 15 minutes they decided it was time to turn the restaurant into a disco. The music of choice (brain-thumping techno) was blasted while colored lights flashed and drunk ass Chinese men undulated to the beat.
The techno was pounding so loud I couldn't hear Karl across the table. However, the dancing was so entertaining I didn't mind so much. Apparently, these vendors from Dordoi Bazaar (the largest bazaar in central Asia) were celebrating several birthdays. The first birthday boy was a stick thin guy with crazy hair who looked more like an anime character than flesh and blood. While they were bringing out his cake, he was busy on the dance floor shaking his head incessantly at the speaker (he had been at it for about 5 minutes). When he finally turned to see his cake, he smacked the bottom of the tray sending birthday cake sailing through the air!
Something snapped in these vendors and the other 6 cakes that were brought out were each smashed is someone's face or flung through the air, candles burning and all. A massive cake fight broke out- girls hiding under tablecloths, people running into our little room thinking they wouldn't dare get the Americans, dishes breaking, chairs being overturned. Within seconds, Andy the manager came to the rescue and shooed the fleeing girls out of our booth and stood guard trying to keep the crazy cake flinging Asians out of our hair. Karl and I stood stunned against the back wall, dodging frosting and birthday candles. After 10 minutes of complete cake soaring chaos, the participants had fled and all that was left was a frosting filled restaurant. Cake was smeared on the walls, the ceiling, splattered on the floor amongst beer bottles and broccoli beef. I don't know how we escaped unscathed. The best part...I had just received a new video camera and took it along to see how it worked...



Friday, October 10, 2008

Honeymoon's Over...Or is it???


So it's been 53 days since I've driven a car, seen a McDonalds, or drank anything but instant coffee (coffeepots and ground coffee are quite difficult to find here). At first everything was interesting and endearing: the rooster crowing incessantly at dawn, waking up to the rhythmic scratch of the old woman's witch-broom on the sidewalks, being surrounded by apple, orange, and eggplant pyramids in the outdoor markets. But then I started work, teaching kids at an American school where embassies pay near $20K per child to educate the diplomat's offspring. Now I leave my flat and prepare myself to make like a sardine on the "marshutka" before the rooster even begins to crow. I realize that the ancient women have to sweep the sidewalks daily because people here have no concept of waste management. If there were no besom broom carrying women, the streets would be filled with candy wrappers, cigarettes, and other unmentionables. Now I realize that every time I go to the markets to buy produce, the vendors figure I'm a westerner and proceed to insist I pay double or triple what the locals pay. Honestly, with $1 being equivalent to 37 com, I feel like I'm spending monopoly money. Yet with all of its flaws, Bishkek is still intriguing and I am still thrilled to be here.
I have finally gotten through the adjustment period. I can use the public transportation to get around. I have bravely bought and cooked "fresh killed meat" (as one local friend likes to call it) from the outdoor bazaars. At home I wouldn't use the same fork to put the meat on the grill as I would to take it off, and now I'm eating unrefrigerated meat that has probably been touched by several flies. And, I finally got internet in my flat. It's a bit expensive, but reliable and pretty fast. With my impetuous decision to accept a teaching job in Bishkek, Kyrgyzstan and start work 3 weeks later, there are many people I did not get to speak to prior to moving. I am hoping that I will keep up this blog so I can stay in touch with those people living half a day before me drinking a cup of joe from McDonalds while driving themselves to work.